I’ve had many losses in my life; losses that range from suicide, deaths of significant family members and endings of old patterns and dynamics. Thus, one could say I’ve also had many new beginnings.

My passion for grief work was sparked 20 years ago after the suicide of my brother. During this time, it became apparent people seemed generally uncomfortable and unavailable when discussing grief. I learned that it was better to keep emotions to myself. I developed a sense of shame related to death based on others (often well meaning) words. Expressions like: “He is no longer in pain and he is in a better place,” left me feeling like my grief was minimized.

This loss was compounded by other’s beliefs and thoughts about suicide. My grief became very private and lonely. Through this experience, I realized I don’t hold judgments about death, rather I am completely at ease talking openly and honestly about death.

In adulthood, my journey through grief and loss continued. My family life turned my life upside down several years ago. The future I had envisioned abruptly ended. Additionally, I experienced two major deaths within six weeks of each other. First, my beloved and adored grandmother and secondly, my well-intentioned father. All were very different losses with different circumstances but all had the common thread; something and someone was lost to me. My world looked completely unfamiliar and I was lost without a compass.

It was during this period that my own journey of transition, self discovery and resourcefulness reinforced the need to provide support to others. Through my experience, I felt the continuum of feelings associated with loss while trying to make sense of how life would look given the trauma and the absence of things familiar. Furthermore, figuring out “Who am I?” without those relationships felt endless.

This process reminds me of a bud in bloom; initially so closed and small. Slowly, over time and through much work, I blossomed alongside my grief and was able to lean into new possibilities. I discovered ways to stay connected to my father and grandmother. I honored the gifts they provided to me. I found strength and hope in the face of the changes. I now know I can have periods of grief and yet carve out a life that has hope and meaning.

My passion for grief work has been steadfast since. My life’s work has always led me to supporting those facing death, bereavement and those experiencing loss and transition. I have continued to learn about the many layers of grief through my own experiences and through those who are courageous enough to share their stories with me. It is a gift to walk beside others on this vulnerable journey.

This is what I pass onto those on this path. It’s a process of balancing loss and yet still living. I teach how to sit with intense emotions and how to be creative in adapting to change. It is not a time to “get past” life changing events; rather it is a time to feel safe, to be vulnerable and share feelings and experiences. I provide hope and awareness while exploring creative ways to remain connected to those that have died and exploring new possibilities in loss.